Jokes

[MikeKozlowski]

FM CAESAR TIBERIUS ROME
TO PREFECT JUDEA JERUSALEM
SUBJ//OPREP-IIIB BEELINE//
RMKS//TURKEY TROTS TO WATER WHERE RPT WHERE IS JESUS OF NAZARETH THE WORLD WONDERS

BT


NNNN

...The purported conversation between a US Marine and a Royal Marine:

RM: "My unit is so old that we pulled guard duty at Jesus' tomb."

USMC: "If we'd have had the duty he wouldn't have gotten away."

Mike

[Bernard Woolley]

The senior line regiment in the British Army, The Royal Scots (now part of The Royal Regiment of Scotland) had the nickname Pontius Pilate's Bodyguard.

[Paul Nuttall]

Meanwhile in Glasgow

[jemhouston]

Meanwhile in Glasgow

10/10 !

[gtg947h]

A rough old general has heard about a unit with the toughest soldiers around and decides to check them out.

After reviewing the troops on parade he visits the medical tent to meet the soldiers there.

The general barks at the first soldier, "Why are you here, soldier?"

"Hemorrhoids, Sir!"

"And how are you treating that?"

"Wire brush and disinfectant, Sir!"

"And what's your goal in life?"

"To kill the enemy Sir!"

Impressed, the general asks the next soldier, "Why are you here?"

"Genital warts, Sir!"

"And how are you treating it?"

"Wire brush and disinfectant, Sir!"

"And what's your goal in life?"

"To kill the enemy, Sir!"

Once again the general is impressed and moves on to the last soldier.

"And why are you here?"

"Gum disease, Sir!"

"And how are you treating it?"

"Wire brush and disinfectant, Sir!"

"And what's your goal in life?"

"To beat those other two to the wire brush, Sir!"

[Timbo W]

Ah a Billy Conolly classic!!

[jemhouston]

No good can come from this

https://www.instagram.com/p/DM8h4cjK4gd ... _copy_link

[Zen9]

Recently saw this on Facebook. Gave me a laugh.
---------
GPT-5 just refactored my entire codebase in one call.
25 tool invocations. 3000+ new lines.
12 brand new files.
It modularised everything. Broke up monoliths. Cleaned up spaghetti.

None of it worked.
But damn it was beautiful.

[Nik_SpeakerToCats]

Struck by an wave of whimsy, now I can again see suburban avians strutting along neighbours' gutters...
We have Dog-Days.
We have Donkeys' Years.
We even have Pig Eons...

[Belushi TD]

If you ever see two large, black birds stuck together, you may rest assured that they are velcrows.

Belushi TD

[Nightwatch2]

If you ever see two large, black birds stuck together, you may rest assured that they are velcrows.

Belushi TD

That’s a murder of a joke

[Belushi TD]

If you ever see two large, black birds stuck together, you may rest assured that they are velcrows.

Belushi TD

That’s a murder of a joke

Only if you tell it at least three times.......

[Nightwatch2]

If you ever see two large, black birds stuck together, you may rest assured that they are velcrows.

Belushi TD

That’s a murder of a joke

Only if you tell it at least three times.......

If you do that Betelgeuse will go Supernova