Darwin award candidate of the day...

Slide along a cold one, kick back and relax. Share amusing stories, anything on your mind, unwind amongst friends.
Post Reply
Nik_SpeakerToCats
Posts: 2417
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2022 10:56 am

Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by Nik_SpeakerToCats »

A neighbour's son works 'ticket office & island platform' at a small station on our local '3rd Rail' system.

News of 'They did WHAT ??' incidents gets circulated by 'word of mouth'...

A recent one did not quite make the news...

There's a rural station a few stops up the coast with a barrier-controlled level crossing a few yards to its South. The barriers were down, the lights were flashing, the sounder was sounding...

A North-bound 3-car train was just coming into sight, slowing to stop at the station.

It was still about thirty seconds away from crossing, when a small 'city car' pulled out of line, zigged around barrier into wide 'safety zone'.

The North-bound train sounded horn, the facing car's driver sounded his horn, by-standers screamed.

Also, a train-horn sounded from the North, Dopplered unto 'Yikes !!'.

The city-car stopped within safety zone.

A second or two later, a 'Not in Service' six-car train came through Southbound at full speed, sorta blew the bugs off that city-car's front fender...

Car's driver will be prosecuted...
If you cannot see the wood for the trees, deploy LIDAR.
User avatar
jemhouston
Posts: 6557
Joined: Fri Nov 18, 2022 12:38 am

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by jemhouston »

Charges include:

Destruction of public property

Criminal misuse of oxygen

Noise and hazard waste pollution

Felony stupid
Nik_SpeakerToCats
Posts: 2417
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2022 10:56 am

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by Nik_SpeakerToCats »

Odds are that driver already has enough 'penalty points' on licence for 'Driving without due care or attention', 'Reckless driving', 'Dangerous driving' or whatever to tip them over the threshold for a year's ban. Plus, perhaps, set requirement to re-take full driving test. Assuming had valid licence, road-tax, insurance etc, as penalties for their lack are severe. Certainly, whatever criminal fine may be levied will be trivial compared to their hurt via insurance increase...
--

I'm currently being 'mogged' by a rather damp cat. I gave Ms Robbie 'The Ratter' a stray pigeon feather several days ago, but she seemed disinterested. This evening, however, I found kitchen deranged, strewn with feathers ranging from 'fluff' to 'flight'. And, perched atop the big, wall-hung fly-zapper, a half-plucked yearling blackbird...

My attempts to catch it only sent it hurtling around kitchen and dining room like a foo-fighter. As currently perched beyond reach, I must hope it gets lucky or careless: former via open kitchen door, latter via the cats, who seem to be tag-teaming it...
If you cannot see the wood for the trees, deploy LIDAR.
Poohbah
Posts: 3512
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2022 2:08 pm
Location: San Diego, CA

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by Poohbah »

jemhouston wrote: ↑Sun Jul 23, 2023 10:30 pm Charges include:

Destruction of public property

Criminal misuse of oxygen

Noise and hazard waste pollution

Felony stupid
Operating a human body in a negligent manner

Failure to exercise the good sense that The Almighty hath bestowed upon a crabapple
Nik_SpeakerToCats
Posts: 2417
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2022 10:56 am

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by Nik_SpeakerToCats »

The young blackbird...

By ~0730 local, hounded by cats, it was tired enough that, after my sporadic attempts to shepherd out of open door and window, it bounced off 'picture' window and landed within reach. I'd been trying to chase it out or kindly net with tea-towel. This time, I grabbed wing.

As it screamed (!!) like proverbial 'stuck pig', I flung it out of door. Scattering fluff-down and small feathers, it 'escaped & evaded' over wall...

But, in its distress, it had managed to 'shat' onto back grille of my favourite microwave, left it leaking 'magic smoke' and making fizzing noises.

Unplugged, left to cool until brunch. Bird-shat had dripped through grille onto windings of cooling fan's 'shaded pole' motor. Needed wary clean.

Okay, four of the case screws were standard cross-heads, two took an uncommon 'Torx', so 'Not In My Standard Set'. Happily, I recognised its odd size as similar to the T-15 'security' I'd got and used to replace our 'upstairs' Dyson 'hoover' cable. Which it was.

The case ends folded out without a fuss, but the top was determined to stay stuck. Wary prising and mild tapping with rubber mallet revealed curved lips that engaged the frame. Motor cleaned, all went back together with scant few false-starts and only mild use of rubber mallet...

Now leaving to stand for several hours to air before daring to try...
If you cannot see the wood for the trees, deploy LIDAR.
Craiglxviii
Posts: 3795
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2022 7:25 am

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by Craiglxviii »

Bird shat inside the house is a real pain to deal with. My now- late cat, Hector, was an absolute bugger in his younger years for bringing home live blackbirds to play with. Same issue as yours, Nik, just in the backs of TVs!
Drunknsubmrnr
Posts: 516
Joined: Fri Dec 02, 2022 2:35 am

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by Drunknsubmrnr »

Ouch.

I just had one of the cats have massive diarrhea while I was at work. I guess it wasn’t all that bad until the vacuum robot drove through it. Looked like a monster truck mud rally. Had to clean the blasted robot with a q-tip and an old toothbrush.
David Newton
Posts: 1859
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2022 9:37 am

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by David Newton »

At my parents' place the problem was Starlings falling down the chimney. There's a cherry tree one garden across and the birds used to pick cherries, fly over to the chimney, eat the cherries and spits the stones down the chimney! Occasionally a very surprised Starling also made its way down the chimney. A cap over the top fixed that particular problem.
Micael
Posts: 7335
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2022 10:50 am

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by Micael »

My parents had a novel event happen two years ago, an eagle overflew the house and air bombed them with a fairly large pike.
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.
Nik_SpeakerToCats
Posts: 2417
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2022 10:56 am

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by Nik_SpeakerToCats »

The microwave, cleaned and allowed to dry, was okay: I'm glad, it was my favourite...

I'm still finding feathers and down.

Upside, have also been replacing the 'porch' inner door's old mortise lock. I'd thought it was the second such, soon found ample evidence it was third. Lock area resembled 'swiss cheese'. I had to re-glue the split filler piece which had let the lock 'wriggle' just enough to derange striker. Have also had to chisel out and glue blocks into frame's mortise, as hole in 'wrong' place for new bolt and striker. Happily, my longest 'frame' clamp, reversed, bridged across doorway, pressing blocks into hole until glue sets. Smaller version, inside mortise, presses those 'top' and 'tail' blocks home lengthwise...

Upsides, I was able to fit thru-bolted lock, so the door now looks good. And, I had the wit to use my 'cheap' chisels as, yes, there were several thin nails buried in the door-frame which would have ruined better...

I'll whittle glued blocks with cordless Ryobi multi-tool, drill pilot holes, screw striker plate all the way through to frame...
If you cannot see the wood for the trees, deploy LIDAR.
Craiglxviii
Posts: 3795
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2022 7:25 am

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by Craiglxviii »

Micael wrote: ↑Mon Jul 24, 2023 8:15 pm My parents had a novel event happen two years ago, an eagle overflew the house and air bombed them with a fairly large pike.
There HAS to be a Monty Python reference here somewhere.
Poohbah
Posts: 3512
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2022 2:08 pm
Location: San Diego, CA

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by Poohbah »

Craiglxviii wrote: ↑Tue Jul 25, 2023 12:42 pm
Micael wrote: ↑Mon Jul 24, 2023 8:15 pm My parents had a novel event happen two years ago, an eagle overflew the house and air bombed them with a fairly large pike.
There HAS to be a Monty Python reference here somewhere.
The chances of a pike getting dropped on you are extremely low, but not zero.
kdahm
Posts: 1819
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2023 3:08 pm

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by kdahm »

Craiglxviii wrote: ↑Tue Jul 25, 2023 12:42 pm
Micael wrote: ↑Mon Jul 24, 2023 8:15 pm My parents had a novel event happen two years ago, an eagle overflew the house and air bombed them with a fairly large pike.
There HAS to be a Monty Python reference here somewhere.
The eagle was just playing the the sport of fish slapping dance, albeit not competently.
Nik_SpeakerToCats
Posts: 2417
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2022 10:56 am

Borax ! Borax !! Borax !!!...

Post by Nik_SpeakerToCats »

Remember TrumPotus' off-script suggestion about ingesting bleach against Covid ? And the resulting epidemic of bleach-induced poison cases ??

Something called the 'Church of Bleach' made a lot of money by selling re-labelled house-hold bleaches to the hapless. They repeatedly ignored medical and legal efforts to make them 'cease + desist', just doubled down on the scam...

IIRC, they even claimed these efforts were conspiracy by 'Usual' Big-Whatevers to suppress bleach's many benefits...

Finally, however, they've landed in 'Dunk Tank', are awaiting severe sentencing...

But, with those purblind purveyors taken off the map, there's a new scam in town: Borax...

Yes, yes, boron salts are essential to plant growth, coffee being exceptionally greedy. Hence the association between sub-tropical subduction volcanos and coffee plantations: No occasional refresh by mineral-rich ash means poor growth, scant crop, minimal flavour. And, yes, minute quantities of boron do seem to be an 'essential trace' for humans. But, we're talking weekly ingestion of boron content of eg one (1) brazil nut...

Seems bleach's surviving 'influencers' have now pivoted to pushing boron, usually as borax, as the latest 'mega-vitamin'. Poisoning cases accrue...

https://arstechnica.com/health/2023/07/ ... cepalming/
If you cannot see the wood for the trees, deploy LIDAR.
kdahm
Posts: 1819
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2023 3:08 pm

Re: Borax ! Borax !! Borax !!!...

Post by kdahm »

Nik_SpeakerToCats wrote: ↑Tue Jul 25, 2023 5:34 pm Remember TrumPotus' off-script suggestion about ingesting bleach against Covid ? And the resulting epidemic of bleach-induced poison cases ??

Something called the 'Church of Bleach' made a lot of money by selling re-labelled house-hold bleaches to the hapless. They repeatedly ignored medical and legal efforts to make them 'cease + desist', just doubled down on the scam...

IIRC, they even claimed these efforts were conspiracy by 'Usual' Big-Whatevers to suppress bleach's many benefits...

Finally, however, they've landed in 'Dunk Tank', are awaiting severe sentencing...

But, with those purblind purveyors taken off the map, there's a new scam in town: Borax...

Yes, yes, boron salts are essential to plant growth, coffee being exceptionally greedy. Hence the association between sub-tropical subduction volcanos and coffee plantations: No occasional refresh by mineral-rich ash means poor growth, scant crop, minimal flavour. And, yes, minute quantities of boron do seem to be an 'essential trace' for humans. But, we're talking weekly ingestion of boron content of eg one (1) brazil nut...

Seems bleach's surviving 'influencers' have now pivoted to pushing boron, usually as borax, as the latest 'mega-vitamin'. Poisoning cases accrue...

https://arstechnica.com/health/2023/07/ ... cepalming/
The bleach peddlers have been in business since 2010, and technically haven't been selling bleach. They've been selling two liquids, a "Miracle Mineral Solution" and an activator, which are combined and then form a weak bleach. They've also been doing it from the standpoint of a religion, not a dietary supplement, in order to evade the weak laws that do exist.

It doesn't help that they were excessively stupid, riding that horse until well past it collapsed and ignoring C&D letters, court orders, and lawsuits, then fleeing to Columbia to evade the law. Instead of doing what semi-intelligent con-men do, and changing to a different scam when the first C&D letter comes in.

Also as opposed to the real intelligent con-men, who either go into politics or mass-market religion.
Nik_SpeakerToCats
Posts: 2417
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2022 10:56 am

Re: Darwin award candidate of the day...

Post by Nik_SpeakerToCats »

IIRC, there was a very similar 'Church of Bleach' running in London area. Seems it grew from selling 'traditional' good-luck charms and other mostly-harmless placebos, embraced the 'bleach' meme...

It was noticed.
It also failed to 'Cease and Desist'...

Official Ire descended. ( Think B-52s pasting bombing range...)

'Trading Standards', 'Advertising Standards', 'Charity Commission', HMC&R (=IRS), medical authorities and local authority queued up to extract their own specific 'Pound of Flesh'.

Running a for-profit business out of a non-profit site ? 'Business Rates' apply. And tax on the earnings. And breached the rules for being a 'church'.
'Trading Standards' and 'Advertising Standards' threw 'bell, book & +candle' at them, plus, yes, 'contempt' for ignoring many prior warnings.
Medical authorities stomped them for selling unapproved, un-licensed, un-QA/QC'd materials and, yes, daring to claim near-miraculous benefits...

I'm sure the US applied similar charges, except Feds can add 'Wire Fraud' etc as 'CoB' sold across state lines...
If you cannot see the wood for the trees, deploy LIDAR.
Post Reply